Sunday, June 17, 2007

Younger than yesterday




impossible songs - Ann, John & Ali.








impossible songs


Don’t look back in anger; in fact don’t bother looking back at all.

Peering into a glass darkly and remembering “how it was” when you were 16 or 21 is a common enough thing to do. Me, I’m currently stuck with looking back at when I was 50, not that it was a bad time or negative experience, it’s just that the CBQ photo vault, which probably rivals the CBQ CD collection in size, has produced some previously unseen footage of my long gone, pre-bonfire fiftieth birthday party. Ah! Those were the days, heady idealism, all things possible, petrol was 84p a litre, you could puff a cigar in pub, Freeview was unheard of and the Artic Monkeys were just fish and chimps. I think we had about 4 myspace friends as well, the party was rather good though the images and events of the last few hours of it are now completely beyond recognition to me or the grasp of my frail memory.

Saturday

Generally we did nothing. Some party debris was cleared and a troupe of passing astronauts kindly zapped all the Japanese Knotweed. Answering the door to a man in a space suit is a slightly disconcerting experience, unfortunately communications broke down as you might expect and the mission seems to have been aborted with the offending weeds, evil and virulent as ever, lying strewn across our lawn threatening to engulf the house. Being the law-abiding citizens that we are we did nothing to disturb the piles of evidence. The evening came and went, we ate chicken, I slept through large chunks of Dr Who, Chronicles of Narnian Rock and something about Las Vegas and gambling, Ali of course read a number of heavy and serious papers during this same time in order to maintain some of the intellectual balance we are trying to achieve.

Sunday

A strange cat and clearly bemused rabbit were holding a Mexican stand-off in the garden as I made the early morning tea, I returned to bed to watch the drama dissolve due to lack of animal interest and a stiff neck. Next came some strange industrial noises from outside which we assumed heralded the return of the astronauts. We hoped they'd come in order to remove the dead weeds in the approved and sanitary manner, as described in Wikipedia. Alas not, instead a barbeque was being set up in our parking area for the good people of Linlithgow or thereabouts to celebrate a young’uns birthday. We did question the organisers about the possibility of further weeding events but they were preoccupied with tenderising meat and passing large amounts of prophane. They then borrowed some of our sugar; however I got a piece of cake due to my sharp and clever negotiation skills. I was left with no choice other than to hitch a lift with Ali to the nearby but far away village of Newton to pick up a paper and a can of tomatoes. The long walk home did me some good and I saw two dead moles and received many friendly and courteous waves from passing motorists. Much of this weekend’s happenings have struck resonant chords, echoing various Ivor Cutler poems and noodles, as good a means as any to avoid the grim, dark cloud of impending depression that seems to stalk most of Scotland’s older inhabitants. I’ve also been whistling the tune below; you can download it from the Daily Reckless on a good day.

PHILOSOPHY (Mackay/McNeil)

Jean Paul Sartre got it right
He said 'Hell is other people'
That means you
Frank Sinatra in 'Strangers in the Night'
Put it another way: Do be do be doo

Plato posited ideals
Marx and Engels - meals on wheels
Socrates was for free will
And midfield wizard for Brazil
Or was that John Stuart Mill?

Philosophy - it isn't tough
Come and have a go if you're Kierkegaard enough.

Descartes thought, therefore he was
But he put it all in Latin to make us think
He was smarter than he was
Good old Descartes, take a drink
He was French and he did maths
He got verrucas at the baths
Just the same as all of us
No solutions - what's the fuss?
Is it obvious?

Philosophy - it isn't tough
Come and have a go if you're Kierkegaard enough.

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